Confessions of a Witch Girl: the destined path

So often we wait for the perfect moment to begin.

We hesitate in our ambitions because we convince ourselves the circumstance’s aren’t right. The perfect storm is still brewing and we need to wait for it to ascend upon us with the ideal climate for creation.

It is in our need for perfection, and thus our waiting for it to appear, that our hesitation constantly wins. Triumphing over

even the strongest of desires, and the loudest callings from our souls.

So, in the honour of this notion that there is never a perfect time to start, this blog comes forth. Written from my bed, fevered and aching, the first post is born from inside of a flu-riddled body.

The intention of this post, and each one here after, is to bring magic in to your life through the catalyst of self discovery, self improvement, and ownership of the witchy parts that exist within you. We all come from ancestors who possessed magic and used it in their daily lives. You are living in a magical universe where your thoughts become things, and your energy creates your reality. If that isn’t magical, tell me what is…

I grew up with magic in my veins. From a young age I was encouraged to see it and find it in my interactions with others, with nature, with animals, with the universe itself. My childhood was spent seeking fairies, unicorns, and other mythical creatures. I spent hours staring at spoons, convinced I could bend them with my thoughts, or move them with my eyes. I could sense magic within me, but was unable to harness its power.

As an adult I see now that the magic I could feel in my body was the innate sense that I held gifts that needed to be shared.

What I thought I felt was powers to cast spells as a child, now I see is the power to step in to myself with full authority. To share my knowledge of the universe, of the soul, with others. What as a child felt like magical powers, as an adult is magical insights and knowings. There is magic created from embodying yourself fully. You unlock innate abilities that only you possess. The reason for your existence springs forward and presents to you keys. Keys that unlock the doors to your destiny.

Unfortunately, just because you make the choice to follow your path to your ultimate truth, does not mean that the path is without its challenges, roadblocks, and setbacks. In fact, at times you may feel that you have completely lost your way, that your destiny is lost. But trust me when I say, it is only in the looking back that all roads make sense. It is never in the midsts of our struggles that we can see the forest through the trees. The whole picture cannot be seen when you are standing in the snapshot of the lens, it is after it has developed that you may stand back and view the situation in its totality.

Divine redirection was never promised to be fluffy and light. I’m not sure where we decided that if it is from God, the Divine, or the Universe, then that must mean it will feel loving and easy. Where and when was this idea taught? Is it because we know deep within ourselves that the Divine is all love that we then translate that to mean that all circumstances sent by the Divine must too feel all loving?

What we forget is that all things are divine, both the black and the white, the darkness and the light, all are halves to the same one whole. So too must life be painted with the brush of both fear and love. Sometimes it is within our ultimately feared circumstance that the most beautiful loving experience is birthed.

I believe only the human ego is self centred enough to believe it does not need suffering, that it is above it. That all things must be fair if it is to know itself as truly worthy. That only good happens to the good, and so then all negative situations are in fact a mistake, an accident, some how the universe ‘messed up’.

But the same divine intelligence that designed the magic of your perfect human body is also the same intelligence that has designed your life plan. So tell me, what does the human ego know in comparison to the source of all that is?

When we can embrace the unfair with the fair, the sadness with the joy, and view it as equally important to our ability to live our ultimate truth- we can find gratitude for every circumstance we find ourselves in.

I choose to know that every situation I experience is always bringing me closer to the divine gifts I was birthed to this planet to experience. I choose to believe that every setback, every painful experience is of equal beauty and value to the fun and loving experiences.

I choose to understand that when a piece of me dies away from extreme pain of circumstance, that a more beautiful and loving piece is grown in its place. Like a dark feminine hydra, beautiful in its ferocity, graceful in its fearless dance across the stones, each head slain, two new ones take its place. That is how I choose to see myself, to see my life.

When we can own our darkness just as much as our light- we integrate each fragment of ourselves in to one glorious complete whole being. We are not meant to be only light or only dark, we are meant to embody both. It is in our duality that we exist so perfectly. Even our human body exists in pairs. Two eyes, two ears, two arms, two legs, two lungs, kidneys…

Even in partnership we find the balance of two beings coming together as one force.

There is symmetry and balance in two. Do not wish away the darkness as it is the balance to your light. The extent to which you hold space for your pain is in exact correlation to the extent that you hold space for your light. If you can truly make room in your body for the hardest emotions you’ve been asked to experience, you can then equally experience love to the same degree as your pain. In this way we can rejoice in our brokenness as we know it is preparing us as a larger container for our wholeness, for our love, for our light.

And so I sit here, reflecting on this truth, as my body shakes with illness and my plans for a weekend away with friends and my partner has collapsed, the divine plan is at work. Redirected from what I believed I should have experienced, and forced in to seclusion.

Surrendering to acceptance that I am exactly where I am meant to be, even if it feels unfair and as if money and time were wasted. The universe knows exactly why things happen as they do, and I choose to trust it in every moment.