Confessions of a witch girl: The Cocoon

Life calls for a constant need to start over. To re make.

To begin again.

When we get comfortable in the knowledge that within our lives we must die a thousand times, each death becomes less painful. We begin to look less at what is dying, and more at what is being born in its place.

We are multi layered beings, and all of these layers interact with each other in a constant feed back loop that is expanding outwards farther and farther. As the loop expands the layers that no longer serve die off, as they no longer are used. Just like the neural pathways inside our brains, when not reinforced with use and positive reinforcement, too die away.

When parts of us die, it is because they are no longer needed for our journey. They have gotten us as far as that version of ourselves could get us. Step forward in to your new version, knowing, glowing, and understanding that the tools needed for your next chapter are within you. Life doesn’t send you along your way without the necessary means to succeed.

Even though it can feel as though you are empty handed, walking in to the unknown, you possess everything you will require to experience the next layer of yourself, and as you experience, the means to experience it also show up.

Life is consistently NOW moments.

There is no tomorrow. Ever. Tomorrow will never be experienced, it is the horizon.

You can spend your whole life chasing it, and never get there, for as you approach it, you realize the spot you thought it would be has moved. You are always in your tomorrow, today.

Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

The English language can make us a fool to the realities of life. There is only present tense, the verbiage was created to teach and translate our conscious experiences to others. But yesterdays and tomorrows are only labels for the continuous now moment you are always living.

Unlike the butterfly, we will enter our cocoons multiple times in our lives. Returning to our gooey states of breakdown, longing to be alone in our solitude why we dissolve.

This process can feel painful, you are disintegrating in to the dust of the lessons you have learned. The lessons that have required you to now lay down the tools you have been operating with, and be bare handed for a moment as you rest in the abyss of your cocoon.

In these moments it is desirable at times to numb. To escape the process that must occur for your unfolding.

I truly believe this is why many of us get stuck. We feel our lives become stagnant.

We long for change but refuse to go inward, to heed the call of our own demise. The demise that needs to occur for the rebirth to follow.

When we don’t honour this call the stagnancy that follows can cause our energy to fester and decay in our bodies. I believe this is when our addictions and negative coping patterns are formed. If you do not sit with the feeling of your current chapter’s end- your mind will become trapped in the avoidance of it. You become avoidant to feeling anything.

What many don’t think about is that when you numb your pain, you also numb your joy. Think of the substances that plague the lives of so many- they numb. They numb our creative force, our emotions.

To have all that you e ever dreamed of you must be willing to participate in the seasons of your own life. The summer, and the winter.